You know that sinking feeling you get when you’re in the middle of something you care about deeply—when you suddenly realize you’re missing one important detail…and you can’t remember what it is?
All you have is the lead weight in your belly and the empty space in your head.
UUUMMMPH! I hate when that happens.
And it’s totally normal—you’ve simply been bested by “Inattention to Details.”
What’s The Deal?
It turns out that there are folks on the planet who are PHENOMENAL with details (fortunately I married one of them). Then there’s the rest of us (myself included) who struggle mightily with the little boogers.
So what’s a person to do??
Fortunately, Everyday Communication Sorcery has a “hack” for that, with a simple 3-step strategy.
Step 1 is the easiest: ask yourself this simple question:
“How much fun do I have with details?”
- If you just groaned and dropped your head into your hands, stay with me here. I promise you that I’ve got your back about handling those details—and you will leave this Playbook post feeling a LOT better.
- If you just perked up and started looking for all those juicy details that are sure to be coming up next, you’re clearly a master of details. Why not either skip this week’s playbook, or join the cheering section for the folks whose back I’ve got when it comes to handling details? (Trust me, I’ve been trained by the BEST—one of whom is that lovely guy I married 34 years ago…)
Now What?
If you’re still reading, I trust that details in general are a chore for you and that you’re ready to try something new—or—you’re here to cheer the rest of us on. (THANK YOU!)
Now let’s get back to the other two steps of that strategy I promised you.
Step 2 in our strategy is actually the most powerful one—it blows this “details” challenge right outta the water. Here’s how:
Now that you’ve admitted that attending to details is a chore for you, Step 2 invites you to recognize that you’re simply “wired” this way. Despite what you may have heard about yourself over the years, this wiring is biological—so it’s not a “moral failure.”
As easy as it can be to start beating yourself up for being a “failure,” recognizing this as a “wiring” issue helps you avoid being caught in the trap that beating yourself up provides; it short circuits your access to your brain and effectively keeps you brainless—not your best strategy when faced with details!
Now that you’ve admitted the truth to yourself, here’s the Everyday Sorcery: Claim your status as a Big Picture Maven! (Yes. I DID make that up, although that doesn’t prevent it from being very effective.)
Incidentally, the word ‘maven” is one of my favorite words from my childhood in the New York City metropolitan area. It means you’re great at something—in fact, famously great in your social circle. (I also find it very fun to SAY…)
Our final Step wraps it all up so you can successfully maneuver a world full of details in your own unique Big Picture Maven way.
Here’s why: now that you recognize you’re great at The Big Picture, you have full access to your brain because you’re playing to your strengths (instead of struggling against your weakness!)
Step 3 invites you to save your energy and attention only for the crucial details of your day—and let the rest go. I think of this as my “details hack.”
For the past several decades, I’ve taught it to my clients with great success—and it’s easy enough to share with you here. All you have to do is ask yourself this question to get ahead of all the details you face each day: “What are the Top 3 Things I need to do today?”
If you’re a Big Picture Maven like me, that means these are not tiny things! Your Top 3 Things are typically categories of tasks or projects that each involve lots of details. What you’ve just done is identified the ONLY DETAILS THAT MATTER TO YOU TODAY—and you can let all the rest of them GO without any guilt. (I learned this strategy over 40 years ago from a fictional character—Sherlock Holmes. Just because he was fictional doesn’t detract one ounce from its usefulness! See what you think when you try it yourself.)
Here’s why: now that you recognize you’re great at The Big Picture, you have full access to your brain because you’re playing to your strengths (instead of struggling against your weakness!)
Step 3 invites you to save your energy and attention only for the crucial details of your day—and let the rest go. I think of this as my “details hack.”
For the past several decades, I’ve taught it to my clients with great success—and it’s easy enough to share with you here. All you have to do is ask yourself this question to get ahead of all the details you face each day: “What are the Top 3 Things I need to do today?”
If you’re a Big Picture Maven like me, that means these are not tiny things! Your Top 3 Things are typically categories of tasks or projects that each involve lots of details. What you’ve just done is identified the ONLY DETAILS THAT MATTER TO YOU TODAY—and you can let all the rest of them GO without any guilt. (I learned this strategy over 40 years ago from a fictional character—Sherlock Holmes. Just because he was fictional doesn’t detract one ounce from its usefulness! See what you think when you try it yourself.)
The 411
Now you know The Top 3 Things about successfully handling details:
- We’re all innately “wired” with a particular capacity for details: either they’re fun/easy for us—or they’re not. We all have a range of details we can manage, from the tiniest minutiae to the biggest generality. There’s no “one right way” to handle details—the most effective way for each of us is to recognize our capacity and to play to our strengths. (This one distinction is the #1secret to reducing—or eliminating—detail-induced stress.)
- If details are less than fun for you, you qualify as a Big Picture Maven. Your innate strength is your capacity to step back and see the overall view of a situation and how all the details can fit together. This is more challenging for folks who are phenomenal at details—where you see the forest, they see each individual tree. Playing to your strength will always help you manage the details you need because you will keep your access to your brain.
- We live in a world of details (more details than any humans have ever faced before!) That’s why the simple question, “What are the Top 3 Things I need to do today?” will keep you focused on the details that matter the most to you. The payoff? You can let go of the rest of the details that show up without any guilt (“those are not the details you’re looking for”) and you can eliminate that “sinking feeling” you used to get when you missed an important detail while drowning in a sea of unimportant ones.
The Top 3 Details From the US Election Cycle This Week
- Project 2025 is alive and well in practices all across this country that are only now coming to light. Most Americans don’t know anything about it. That’s why I’m unapologetically sharing it in every way I know how. Check out this page from Red Wine & Blue—and please share it with everyone you know.
- Millions of registered voters are being purged from the rolls in many states across the country—just one of the practices taken directly from the Project 2025 playbook. CHECK YOUR REGISTRATION STATUS NOW so you won’t be surprised later. Here are two sites to help you: https://www.vote.org/ and https://www.voteriders.
org/staterules/
- Outrageous lies are being sold as the truth, so it’s crucial to pay attention to your sources. One person I trust thoroughly and read daily is Heather Cox Richardson who gives you the current details truthfully and then connects them to the BIG PICTURE of history. (And OBTW: NOBODY in Springfield, Ohio is eating anybody’s pets—and—the thriving Haitian community there are all legal residents who positively contribute to the greater community.)
Have another great week, my dear Mavens!